I've been in a grumpy mood today. Poor Jeff - we went shopping today and used two separate carts - one for each kid - and I kept accidentally running into him with my cart. He's going to have bruises on his ankles I'm sure. Anyway, after a while of that I threw one of my grumpy fits and ran off with my cart and Zaylee to be alone for a while. He tried to follow, so I lost him in the lingerie aisles (he won't go in there). After cooling off for a bit, I found him and apologized.
Somehow it seems I'm always the one apologizing and he's the one being all nice and forgiving. It's not that he's never sorry, it's just that he never does much that needs to be apologized for. I'm always the one throwing a fit, being grumpy, talking sarcastically, and basically doing all the stuff that requires apology.
I hope I have a better day tomorrow. It's really discouraging to want to cheer up but not be able to. I'll feel badly about being grumpy, so I'll want to be nice to Jeff, but find myself talking with a really rude tone of voice, against my will. I don't know what's wrong with me. I just get these mood swings and can't seem to do anything about it until the darkness passes and I'm happy again. It's frustrating, inexplicable, and just hard to deal with.
Okay, I'd better just end this post before it gets too depressing.
6 comments:
I get that way sometimes too. I'm much more likely to be the one throwing a fit than Aaron is. He, like Jeff, is pretty patient with my attitude swings. Hope today's better for you!
I too have bad moods...I hope that things turn happier and that you get some time just for you. Part of it is probably just stress...thinking of you!!
Mark and I are the same way. What is infuriating is when I am apologizing and I say I have no idea why I blew up so bad over nothing, he just calmly says "You must have low blood sugar, you do this every time you do." That may be the case, but 9 times out of 10 he had done something stupid in the first place, and I was just saying that I blew up too far, not saying it because I had gotten mad at all. But hey, at least you aren't alone, and now you have internet!
Steve is a little less tolerant of my mood swings, not that he gets ugly about it, just that if he hasn't done anything to deserve my attitude then he expects me to not throw it at him. If you feel like it's causing a problem, you may want to talk to a doctor about it; it may be something that the medical profession can help you with. Just food for thought... I really hope you have a better day, though. A week or so ago, I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed and was fairly sullen with Steve and the kids all day. No particular reason for it. But that doesn't happen too often, thank goodness!
Mark was reading this to me and he said, "Huh sounds exactly like you!" Har har not funny! lol. I guess the Basker Boys are attracted to the same kind of gals. Maybe try to get to the temple more do a couple sessions, if you aren't now, and ya know talk to Heavenly Father and I bet he will help you with it.
I do the same thing, and Josh does the same thing Jeff does. It makes me feel like a complete jerk, like I'm not treating him very well. Then he gives me a hug and tells me he loves me. (but if he says "it's okay" i blow up even worse because i know it really isnt'.)
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